Self-Control:
The Key to Getting What You Want
Part One
by Kevin Hogan
When I wrote The 168 Hour Week: Living the Life You Want 24/7, I hoped people would appreciate some of the answers to the problems of why "Time Management" can't work as it is currently and generally understood.
In the book, I shared with you some of the causes of this big picture "time management problem," and then went on "to solve it."
But most people won't be able to "solve it" if they don't develop
the trait of Self Control.
Today some important facts show that Self Control causes Life
Mastery and in fact you can make it all happen in real life... Your
real life!
A few areas to cover today, so let's start with... (coin flip)
The Schedule
You know...just doing what is on the schedule...should be easy.
But, it never is, It's not real life and it typically doesn't work
in the short term...and it never "works" for any extended period of time.
There are two broad categories of "reasons" why this is the case.
Most of the reasons are "outside of The Self". In other words, "they aren't your fault".
But there are a few things which do lie within The Self, and thus
illuminate the absolute MYSTERY of why people can't control
themselves. So let's look at what YOU CAN CONTROL and then examine how you can actually pull off what very few others...can do!
In the last 20 years, "self-regulation" has become one of THE things to study in Universities all around the world. Self regulation is the study of what it takes to be in CONTROL of the SELF.
In other words:
- If you don't want to be fat you should be able to choose to be skinny...but it doesn't quite work that way.
- If you want to save for retirement you should just be able to do that...but it doesn't happen.
- If you want to exercise because your LIFE depends on it, you'd think you'd have the motivation....but...no, you don't.
- If you want to do anything to make your life better it would just seem simple enough to put it into your daily planner and do it...but that isn't the case because the brain doesn't work the way the gurus tell you that it does.
Self Regulation is:
"...those processes, internal and/or transactional, that enable an individual to guide his/her goal-directed activities over time and across changing circumstances (contexts). Regulation implies modulation of thought, affect, behavior, or attention via deliberate or automated use of specific mechanisms and supportive meta-skills."
Karoly (1993)
Ah...there IS a definition...so why the HECK can't people do
something so easily defined?!
We're learning more and more about what really works and what
doesn't and as always, my job in life is to give you the inner scoop
as to which is which. (Preferably in plain English, not academic
jargon, if that's... okeedokee with you.)
Self-control is the ability to make decisions about how and when we
express our thoughts and feelings, and which of our impulses to act on.
Self-control is about driving your own brain as you would a car. This is what
you ultimately want to have happen:
- You think of where you want to go.
- You head out in that direction.
- Stuff happens along the way (like detours, road construction).
- You take actions to either wait for the road to open (next year) or take a newly planned detour now.
- See if you're getting there using the route.
- Get there.
You did it relatively quickly and completely because of self control.
Sounds pretty darn easy...
And yet that's not how things go down in the real world.
Why Can't People Control Themselves?
Why do people find themselves completely unable to reroute their plans, control or direct their frustrations toward changing their behaviors to get to their destination, and instead.... get somewhere, which is right next to nowhere?
Self control is an absolute CONDITION of success. So just HOW do you make it happen??!
You can do it...probably...: Page | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 
Kevin Hogan
Network 3000 Publishing
3432 Denmark #108
Eagan, MN 55123
(612) 616-0732
Photos appear under license with Stockexpert.
