Getting Women to Say "Yes!"
by Kevin Hogan
Most people in relationships, business, working in a professional practice or selling, will instantly confirm for you that men and women think (process information) very differently.
Men and women not only have different buying "strategies," their resistance levels and changes in resistance during conversation shift in different directions when presented with the identical information.
Finally, their behavior in the buying process is very different.
Knowing all of that, is only helpful if you know WHAT is different and what you can do with that knowledge.
Question: How do you cause women vs. men to say "yes" to you?
When influencing someone to buy you, your products or services you can choose to be effective with both men and women or... not.
To be effective, you utilize different processes with men than with women. Simple enough.
Obviously, in order to persuade, you must get past resistance in order to get to "yes."
There are a number of methods to overcome resistance. But the methods are NOT equally effective
with men vs. women.
Consider the notion of distraction.
For years people who study hypnosis have been taught that distraction can be a powerful tool.
What happens for that therapist who uses distraction?
Completely mixed results depending on whether they are communicating with men or women.
Look and see...
Does resistance reduce or increase when SLIGHTLY distracted?
It's really easy to screw up any request for agreement or compliance, in any context.
The tiniest distraction can cause
an almost guaranteed "yes" response and turn into a "no." And the opposite is also true!
Want to lower a man's resistance to you and your message? How about women?
Here's how a tiny distraction can help or hurt a proposal or change an opinion...
This simple but remarkable experiment reveals what reduces resistance to a proposal (an idea)
and what does not:
University men and women are divided into five groups.
A short written proposal that says that, "exit exams will be starting in one year to qualify for graduation," are given to members of each group.
No one is going to like this message.
The question is, how upset will they be when they hear the message?
To begin with they privately ask a bunch of students, in writing, how they feel about the idea.
Then they ask another group the same thing and then add distractions to their proposal.
In this case the distractions are in the form of gift certificates of differing values.
These various denomination gift certificates are attached to the bad news sheet....good for cash value at local merchant. The gift certificates can be 50 cents, $1, $2, $2.50, or $5.00.
The gift certificate is used as a distraction from the message which is in no way related to the gift certificate.
The study is assessing the distractability and emotional response to a message once a distraction is introduced...and then find the differences between the men and women.
The people are told that, "the gift certificates were attached to the proposals because they were left over from a previous group." The people have no idea that the gift certificates are relevant to their response to the proposal.
The people are asked to respond to the proposal by evaluating how opposed they are to the proposal.
A 1-5 scale is used where "one" is no significant opposition (they don't care). A "five" is high opposition and they are very upset about it.
To understand the differences between reducing or raising women's resistance compared to men's, we first
evaluate the responses of men.
There is a big difference between men and women!
The Control Group of men averaged out to being upset and opposed to the idea (3.5 on a scale of 0-5)
Now, how does each distraction impact resistance and opposition to the proposal from men?
50 cent certificate attached?: Almost no opposition to the proposal! (0.5/5.0)
$1.00 gift certificate attached? These men are upset just like the controls! (3.5/5.0)
$2.50 gift certificate attached? The men in this group on average are modestly opposed and upset. (2.5/5.0)
$5.00 gift certificate attached? These men are VERY VERY upset/oppositional! (4.0/5.0)
Think for a moment.
Some of the men are given a $5 gift certificate with the bad news and they hate the news
more than when given nothing!
A similar group of men are given a 50 cent gift certificate with the bad news and they could now care less
about the news.
Clearly the "bigger distraction" caused men to much more upset (greater resistance) where a meager throw away distraction
caused them to not care.
Want men to accept your bad news idea? Reduce their resistance?
The 50 cent gift certificate did the trick and remarkably so. In fact, it virtually eliminated their resistance.
With men, a tiny, meaningless distraction is all it takes to convert great opposition to seeing something as a non-threat!
A reasonable guess would mean that giving someone a cup of coffee or a bottle of water while making a proposal, might be the equivalent of a 50 cent certificate in a business setting.
Giving them $5, however, caused their opposition to be increased when compared to the group who had no gift certificate paper clipped to their proposal.
KEY POINT: What's it mean?
It means that as a group, men were very opposed to an idea and when you gave them a VERY SMALL/meaningless token "gift" it softened their position DRAMATICALLY. But when you increased the the size of the gift it didn't help matters, it made them more upset in the largest amount.
A fancy dinner probably will go a long way toward making things worse with men.
What reduces resistance with women?
What reduces resistance with women?: Page | 1 | 2 | 3 |
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