by Kevin Hogan
The control freak is the guy who gets the girl.
She is the girl who gets the guy...
Think about it...
If you really want people to say yes to you, they need to feel in
control of themselves, the situation, the decision. If you want your
Self to actually BE MOTIVATED, you need to feel "in control."
How to Get Control?
How do you get people to feel in control; and how can you possibly
get your Self to feel in control?!
And what if you weren't in as much control of something as you might
Let me give you an example.
Someone says, "You know on an airplane you have zero control. None.
You are at the mercy of the mechanics and pilots and hope both did
their jobs and pray the pilots want to get to their destination."
That frame says, you have zero control on a plane. That makes
everyone's heart skip a beat. Having been through an extended period
in the 90's where I was scared to death to fly, I can tell you that
that "feeling" of "not in control," can become pretty impressive.
But what if I said, "What moron ever told you that? You are in total
control! You decided to fly instead of drive because it is almost
impossible to get killed flying on a jet." It's like someone saying,
"Oh yeah, you think you're safe in your living room? Well when that
ceiling collapses on your head, you tell me how you feel."
Now ceilings just don't collapse on people's heads all that often.
Those are about the odds of someone getting killed in a plane crash.
But all of a sudden, you feel a little more out of control than you
did before....so let's flip it back.
"...and obviously ceilings don't collapse on people in their living
rooms and that's why you're hanging out in your living room and not
on the race track today. You have 100% CONTROL of this decision and
your decision is what keeps you safe. You aren't asking a lot of
cooperation from everyone else in the house. It's pretty fail-safe.
You sit in your living room you are safe. Same with a plane. A plane
goes into the air where there is basically no traffic. It uses
similar principles to staying "up" that a ceiling does, and you
choose to take the plane because you want your life to be uneventful
as far as the life and death thing goes. The decision is 100% yours.
You are in total control."
And there you have it.
Is control only an illusion?....
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