Can You Motivate Them to Change?
Become A Person of Influence
Copyright 2008 by Kevin Hogan
Page 3
The Cornerstone of Motivation
Question: Can a person of influence, someone with great empathy, also be intense, tough-as-nails, focused, able to self-satisfy at many levels? Of course. People are allowed to have as many characteristics as they can...empathy is simply the cornerstone of motivating others.
Fact: If you are empathetic, you will have the instant reservoir to tap into to create change in other people's lives. This doesn't mean you will successfully utilize your reservoir, it just means that you don't have to work on building it!
So what is the big deal with something as touchy feely as empathy? Well, if you're truly wondering, then it would be useful to begin working on empathy.
We all want to be understood and liked by others. People who are empathetic make it a point to understand others and to look out for the interests of everyone.
Salespeople, take a lesson from the great therapist (who truly is a great salesperson). Numerous studies reveal that 50% of the results they achieve with a client at the one year point of demarcation is due to the therapist's personal qualities, of which the most crucial is empathy. The remaining causes of success in therapy are spread out among the approach, the client's motivation, their environment, etc.
When I say that people don't buy the product or service and that they are buying YOU, I'm not kidding.
In the most simple terms: Your client is buying the empathy they feel in you.
There is little or no resistance toward the salesperson (or therapist) that has the complete best interest of the client in their heart and mind.
What About the Client?
We can talk more about the salesperson (therapist!) in a bit. For now let's switch to the other side of the table. The client.
The client, whether a prospect in a sales context, or a person needing therapy...the elements are identical. In order for you to motivate your client, your client will need to meet several criteria.
Your client must be capable to change or take action. This simply means that they can literally do something if they chose it. You can try selling an airplane to a guy who can't afford a matchbox car but he won't be able to take action.
Your client must be ready to change or take action. Remember that most people are mired in the status quo. The client who smokes or drinks too much who doesn't have an interest in changing isn't likely to be motivated to change. Similarly the prospect who really believes that he doesn't need to invest his money or buy a car that will get his family safely from point to point will need to be motivated to get to the "ready" stage. A person is ready when it is the most important thing to them and whatever they were holding onto previously becomes secondary.
People don't like giving up anything. Attitudes, beliefs, feelings, emotions, thoughts, ANYTHING. People want to hang onto what they are familiar with.
People say they want to quit smoking...and "part of them" probably does...but it isn't as important as what they are getting from the experience itself. The person is ready to make a change when they have shifted their priorities.
The client must be willing to change. Do they want "it" at all? If it doesn't hit their radar, then you haven't experienced a client that even wants to make a change. They see no reason. They feel nothing. And...nothing will happen as a result.
Your client will need to be approached in a fashion that will trigger change. The "approach" will vary from person to person. Over the years, salespeople have learned that high pressure simply created enemies and can destroy the relationship. 30 years ago various therapeutic styles fell into the category of being confrontational. (Direct challenges to the client.) These styles might work with a specific individual but overall, they were a miserable failure. For the most part confrontation failed.
Read more about the motivation to change. Turn the page...
